The Path of Least Resistance

My life is a very good life by all the usual standards.  I bushwhacked through the jungle of youth, hacked out a path over the years, widened and smoothed that path, trimmed up the edges, planted flowers for colour and now I walk back and forth on it with the realization that it isn’t really leading me anywhere. There is nothing wrong with this path, it’s perfectly acceptable, I suppose.  The epitome of the path of least resistance.  With very little effort I can continue to keep it in good workable shape and never need anything more. But….there is a but and it’s a pebble in my shoe as I tromp back and forth on my path. In the past I have been able to shake the pebble about in my shoe to a more comfortable spot where I hardly notice it but lately it won’t stay there, it keeps coming back to poke me in the heel. A rock under your heel will not be ignored, it demands attention. So, I am sitting down on my path and removing that rock from my shoe.  In fact, I may take the shoes off altogether. 

When I talk of a new path I’m not talking about traveling the world with a backpack or leaving my husband and family behind for an ashram in India.  I’m a firm believer in the old adage that “wherever you go, there you are”.  Self-exploration can be done from home, in fact, being in that ashram might just be a great diversion and I don’t need more diversions.  Decades of caring for a family have left me so attuned to other people’s needs that I have forgotten how to listen to my own.  Getting diverted by other people has become my fallback position.  It feels good to help and can be rewarding and for some it is enough.  This doesn’t mean I will be ignoring my old path, merely adding to it.

Maybe it is my age, the ever speeding up of the passing years. I am at the end of a decade, I’ll be sixty next year and I think that the end of a decade is a touchstone for many people.  A time to look back on the previous ten years and do a summing up. I believe some of us do it unconsciously and end up suddenly leaving a marriage or a long career behind in an effort to make the next decade look different.  Others like me do it much more slowly, with a great deal of thought and consideration for the people in our lives it may affect.  Tiny steps, carefully taken.  This blog is my first step.  With it I have tentatively taken my machete out and started to whack away at the jungle beside my tidy, old path in the hope that a new path will slowly emerge.  Every person that views my blog adds a little power to my machete.  So, thank you, I’m grateful. 

Taking a New Path by Jill Charuk
www.jillcharuk.com